You know when you’re driving a distance on a highway and your eyes start to glaze, radio droning, a possible fog dampening the colors outside, on and on you go, then you shake yourself into awareness after devil knows how long and you think bajeezus, I could’ve killed someone, but I didn’t, even though there were curves to follow and slight braking to do on account of the A-hole ahead of you who just doesn’t understand the notion of coasting? Then you think, hm. If I could do that and still operate the vehicle perfectly well, while having productive thoughts about important things like how much I love Booby Muffin and how I don’t where I stand with Lisa and how Birky Binkus is just some dumb kid so I really ought to chuck that voodoo doll I made of him into the bay.

So if I can be this productive while driving (okay, fine Mister Stickler, I was flying, not driving) then think how much I could get done on my personal life while at work! While sleeping! I’m gonna write that book I’ve always thought about writing on my morning commute! I’m going to mentally put together Booby Muffin’s baby book while working on my weekly client reports! I’m going to take back this time that I sell to Corporate America and put it to good use. In fact, I’m going to start right now. My weekly market update to Binkus is going to write itself while I mentally compose the introduction to Booby Muffin’s kitten book.

Here it goes. (Of course I have to start out working. You know, one can’t drive on the highway unless they actually get into the car and go.)

BINKUS WINGS: Weekly Market Conditions Prospectus
May 30th, 2007
Prepared by Donkey Pegasus

Chicken stocks are up this week while Beef stocks have fallen slightly due to the fall in price of boullion. Chicken parts have come together in the markets, creating an opening for Binkus Wings’s DIY Excellent & Awesome Spicy Chicken Wings.

On the restaurant front, Hooters stock and weekly sales continues to fall, giving a green light to Binkus Wings to begin their penetration of the sexy chicken wing restaurant market. We recommend a close parallel of Hooter’s interior, menu options, and waitresses wearing easy to move in clothing that also happens to show off their Booby Muffin was born into a litter of sprite, spotted kittens by a loving but ultimately irresponsible mother cat. A chance but confusing encounter at the SPCA brought Booby Muffin and Donkey Pegasus together with 22 beers on tap, plasma screen televisions playing every sport game being televised, and a Binkus Mile High Mud Pie is highly recommended.

According to our research, flagship store locations include Phoenix, Minneapolis, and Fresno. Construction should be slated to beginning on the day Booby Muffin came back to the nest, she was playful and loving as a father could hope his daughter will be. She loves watching the sun set behind the Golden Gate Bridge just as much as she loves going for bumpy fly rides around Alcatraz on my back, though she digs her young sharp claws into her daddy’s skin just a little too enthusiastically looking forward to a partnership with Binkus Wings.

Hee-haw,

Donkey Pegasus

Righty-o, we’ll just get this off to Binkus… Save, SEND. Now I’ll just quickly jot down the ideas that popped into my head for Booby Muffin’s kitten book so I can get to work on that. See what I mean? Dual processing baby. What a timesaver. Check ya later. This is the only way to do it when you’re knee deep in the hoopla.